My apologies for having completely forgotten that i own a blog. I just rememebered when a notification popped up on my phone screen. It still feels good to have others appreciate what you write.
So many twist and turns had happened in my life all of a sudden. THE FUCK WITH MY UNDIAGNOSED ADHD. IM A MOM NOW.
Thats how forgetful i am. A quick flashback in the past i got to work in a hospital. I struggled real hard because of the boring routine in the ward. Or maybe because im just forgetful. Lol. During evaluations in the past they always complained that how i work was unfocused, always chill and i jump from one task to another. Been also labeled as dumb but come on, past is past. Ive been working for more than 7 months and they said that i have improved. Although the chill style is still there. Little did i know that i was pregnant with my first child. (I confirmed it on my 2nd trimester)
So i was still working until my due date and did not even bother to consult what really bothered me before. Yet i was still practicing focusing on things. And today the sad part is i havent seen my baby yet. Our lives have been put in danger on my baby’s way out.but lets just see the brighter side: we’ll see each other soon once i get out of this prison. The baby is still at NICU.
Prison is what i call this ward because you are all alone. No one will assist you. This is a government hospital by the way. in a third world country. Lol. And the staff seemed liked upper rank demons. No matter how nice you are they will end up eating you lol.
To be honest im kinda nervous in my new venture. This was unexpected and with a little attention span.. i just hope it would work well. My baby’s a strong girl and i wish her a strong will. SHE’S an aquarian.. a fixed sign so maybe that helps lol. I also hope she wont inherit my undiagnosed ADHD. I will just do my best to focus on her for the meantime together with my recovery.
So for me this is a new struggle. Learning to focus on my new goal might help me focus on my next goal as if i wasnt forgetful, chill and wishy washy type of person. Lets see how it goes.
Obviously my writing isnt good enough. Because i was just passing the time lol. For my final message. Life is always hard. Choose your own hard.
fast forward to future 